A UNITS MANUAL TO SURVIVE YOUR OWNER
by chaos-dark-lord
Summary: The owner of a unit gets a manual about their unit,the units secretly receive this manual about themselves and to survive their owners.Why units are given  free so easily if the order was messed,What happens when a unit is returned? The answer are here.


**I read some fics about the units based on the manuals of Lollidictator (I even made a manual for México myself), and then I thought that the units also received a manual about themselves and about what to expect and how to deal with their owners.**

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**A UNITS MANUAL TO SURVIVE YOUR OWNER**

Dear Unit, congratulations on being purchased from our company! From now on you´ll be living with your owner, and to ensure the complete satisfaction of our client and a safe and pleasant interaction between you and your master we have provide your owner with a manual about you, the unit he or most likely she purchased, and we have provide you, the unit in question, with a manual about what you need to know about you and how to deal with different situations that could arose, as a note to you your owner does not know you have this manual hidden in your clothes and we suggest you to keep this manual a secret.

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**ABOUT YOU**

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You are an Hetalia unit manufactured by the "Flying Mint Bunny" Company, you are a perfect replica of a character of the anime series Axis Power Hetalia / World Powers Hetalia, you have been programed to act and respond like the original character so don´t worry about how you act because whatever you do, you will act like you are supposed to even if it seems completely inappropriate, strange, obnoxious and/or harassing.

You also can be reprogrammed by your owner in different modes and you have special abilities that will be put to use by you owner (probably in strange ways), you also are programmed to belong to only one owner which name and characteristics has been already included in your programming (thankfully for you we have not informed our clients about this detail), so every unit delivered to a person is supposed to belong to that person and no one else, as such if there has been a mistake in the order and we have accidentally delivered the wrong unit we will try to make the person keep the unit as to not waste it even if we have to give it for free as the return process is to costly, so deal with it if the person didn´t ask for you and does not want you, because said person owns you in every sense of the word, to ensure this we also have programmed you with unquestionable loyalty for said person at the very least to a minimun level, however this does not prevent you from being a complete ass and/or jerk/bitch with your owner.

You also has already the knowledge and tendencies that the original character should have about everything, from lenguages and cooking to knowledge about other characters (units) and you are related to them as the original character should, for example if the original character has a brother then the unit of said brother is your brother.

You come with basic accessories like clothes (specially one military uniform for whatever fetish your owner has) and you can convince your owner to buy you replacements or more accessories from our vast online supply or even buy them yourself, however your programming also prevents you from purchasing other units, however you can try to influence your owner to purchase a specific unit.

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**DELIVERING**

You are or have been delivered with as much carefulness as possible in wooden crate big enough to hold you and your accessories and shipped directly to your owner´s address which from now on shall be yours too.

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**AWAKENING**

We suggested your owner about various methods to wake you up and it was your owners choice which one to use, if you accidentally woke up inside the crate during the delivery you are to try to go back to sleep and wait for you to be delivered.

One awake we suggest you to get rid of your box as soon as possible, if your owner wants to send you back then she will need the crate you came in or something big enough for you and your accessories, and things that size are costly and hard to come by, so getting rid of the crate will at the very least give you enough time to convince your owner to keep you or simply to get resigned to that.

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**ABOUT YOUR OWNER**

As we stated earlier you belong to your owner and you exist for the sole reason of fulfilling her strange and unusual fantasies (because there's almost 100% chance that your owner is female, unfortunately for you its also a very high possibility that she is an adolescent girl, if you´re lucky she will be between 18 and 28 years old, if not then you can bet that she is probably 14-16 meaning that you will be not only a bodyguard but also an unwilling babysitter) don´t worry, since you´re a unit and not human perse then there is no legislation anywhere that says that sexual intercourse is illegal and there is absolutely no risk of pregnancy as units cannot reproduce (so yeah, you can have sex with no worries) , however you should be very aware that you owner is probably a yaoi fan and may have acquired another unit, and you know where this is going.

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**SOME POSSIBILITIES**

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About your owner these are the most likely possibilities that we have acknowledge:

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-Your owner is female, either adolescent or a young adult (so when speaking of your owner we shall refer as "she").

-She either has no friends or have very few and very strange ones.

-She probably lives alone and has family problems.

-She is a lonely freak with some kind of mania or mental disorder (she ordered you after all).

-If she didn´t ordered you then she received you as a gift (she´s your owner anyways and the purchase order were filled specifically for her, this does not chance or invalidate any of the possibilities we present you here).

-She might as well be a yaoi fan.

-She is probably ordering or receiving other units besides you.

-She will get irritated by your actions and advances even if she enjoys them (and she probably need those advances anyways).

-Her house will be big enough to have at least 1 or 2, or 3 extra rooms for you and some other units.

-She won´t be as wealthy as so wish (she probably spent all her money on you and other units).

-She could have ordered you believing that she was buying a life sized Hetalia sex doll or random Hetalia merchandise.

-She probably didn´t read any description before cliking the "buy" button.

-She may not even known she ordered you.

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**FULFILLING YOUR OWNERS WISHES**

Just do it ! you are your owners companion, bodyguard, friend, possibly boyfriend (very unlikely a girlfriend but it does happen) sex toy or whatever she decides you should be (and even if she does not decides things tend to go that way), however you should follow your tendencies and try to establish a deep relationship with your owner, if you do maybe you´ll get her and another unit to do a trio.

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**EVERYDAY LIFE WITH YOUR OWNER**

Try to get along.

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**YOUR MAINTENANCE**

You are perfectly capable of taking care of you and your owner given that your owner provides you with the necessary for that, remember that your owner is also responsible for you and it might do well to remember her this and that you are not a fancy pet (unless she´s into that) every once in a while.

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**ABOUT OTHER UNITS**

All units are programmed to react to other units as the original characters of Hetalia, other interactions and relations can happen or chance if the units enter one of their other modes, by incidents or by passing time along each other like any common person.

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**FAQ**

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Q1- I'm in a dark and cramped place, why is that?

A-You probably are still inside your delivery crate, try to go back to sleep. How are you even reading this manual? It´s dark in there.

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Q2-I don´t know how my owner woke me up, but I was very scared/angry/exited and my owner ran away, what do I do now?

A-Look for your owner around the place (most likely her house) and apologize, there is a high possibility that she is in a cabinet, a cupboard or under a table, probably in the kitchen, look there first.

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Q3-Can my owner give me away as a gift to someone?

A-Even if she tries ,you are already set for your owner and respond only to her, so giving you away as a gift after you have been delivered and activated upon meeting her is not an option (If she wants to give a unit as a gift then she must purchase it in our site and give the information about the person its supposed to be a gift for so that a new unit may be programmed and send to said person).

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Q4-Do I have guarantee?

A-Yes, a live long guarantee.

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Q5-What happens with a returned unit ?

A-All returned units are deactivated, dismantled and disposed off, this process is costly for us and a real waste, that's the reason why we try for the owner to keep the delivered unit.

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Q6- If my owner abandons me or does not want me what happens?

A-Any unit with no owner will deactivate automatically within a given time (this time is random and varies but normally consist of a few weeks to give time to the owner to reconsider).

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Q7-My owner does not like my food, how is that possible?

A-Units (most of them at least) are proficient with a determinate style of food, its normal that your owner wants to try something else every once in a while.

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Q8-My owner does not even want to get close to my food!

A-Maybe she has strange tastes? We don´t care, so don´t bother us about this, fix it with your owner.

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Q9-I'm trying to get along with my owner but we despise each other.

A-Manage something, your owner is probably not as bad as she seems, she probably has mental/social problems or both, maybe she just needs a bit of love, friendship and companiosnship (thats why you are there! ) as long as your owner does not abandon you, you should be fine , in that case refer to Q5 & Q6.

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Q10-Im not good with getting along with others.

A-Deal with it.

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Q11-Can I reprogram myself or other units?

A-You cannot reprogram yourself although some units can reprogram others or activate some modes.

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Q12-I can´t kill my owner, but can I kill/main/etc other units?

A-Actually you can in theory (and in practice) kill, maim or whatever to anyone but your owner, just remember what happens in cases Q5 & Q6, so try not to upset your owner too much by killing her family or her other units (or make sure not to get caught).

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Q13-Can I contact the company?

A-Yes, but we advice you not to unless under extreme necessity regarding other units, and never about yourself.

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Q14-Do I have a final say in this?

A-No, but your owner doesn´t know that, so you can try to persuade her on antything, also we remind you that you have your own personality, mind and tastes (set at a standard and as a basis at the beggining after your activation but that will develop with time in an unique way), and you can learn and live like a normal (more or less) person despise yours and your owners strange personality twirls.

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**That explains why units are given for free so easily if the order was delivered wrong or what happens when a unit is returned (and why units avoid that at all costs).**

**has someone got the problem about the document manager not recognizing double-enters for spaces? thats why i had to add a .(point) there.  
**


End file.
